The question: Is chivalry dead? My boyfriend never opens the car door. #wwgwd
Dump his sorry ass…In all seriousness, this is a question I hear from a lot of my girlfriends. The world of chivalry can be a difficult one for men/boys to deal with. With women’s liberation and independence being a hot issue, many men fear that opening a door can be misconstrued. It can be confusing for men to figure out when it is ok to be chivalrous and when it might hamper a woman’s independence.
I am not so sure the issue is about chivalry, but more about common courtesy because it is not limited to men. I often open doors for other women, only to find that other women slam the doors in my face. Recently, I took the trolley in San Francisco. The trolley was very crowded, I was holding my three year old son in my arms and a couple of shopping bags. The only person who offered their seat to me was an elderly gentleman, who really probably needed the seat. I declined his seat, but he refused to allow me to stand with my son in my arms. I was horrified that the young people around me refused to give up their chair.
This isn’t really about chivalry, it is really about common courtesy. Opening a door, giving up a seat, letting the other person order first at a restaurant- these are all ways we can be courteous and thoughtful
Unfortunately, not all women or all men are created equal. What you may find chivalrous, may be completely different than your best girlfriend. If your boyfriend doesn’t open the car door and it is important to you, let him know! If you expect him to pick you up for your date, ask him! Set expectations at the beginning and if he doesn’t respond, he might not be the right man for you. If he does respond, he might be a keeper!
Ginger Knows is my personal blog. The opinions expressed on this blog are my own and are not that of my company, my employees or my kids :)
